Ah, yes, the joys of church choir and the contribution it is to my musings...
This past Sunday, as I sat in practice I felt an overwhelming love for someone very near and dear to me. Now, I often get these feelings, and they are for many different wonderful people in my life, but this particular day it just so happened to be my own dear father. A man was singing in the choir behind me, and his voice and the way he was singing just reminded me of my father when he used to sing in choir. He still does, I think, but I'm not home to witness it so I miss out.
What struck me the most is the remembrance of his smile and the easy-going attitude he has always seemed to have. Of course, there are things that can rile him up, and he does get upset once in awhile, but those times are few and far between. He has plenty of reason now to decide to complain and make excuses to lay about and do what he wants, but somehow his best reason for doing that has become his reason for getting up and working hard every day. I wonder how I can express how much this means to me and how amazing I think this wonderful man is...
My dad has a neurological disease. It makes tedious jobs impossible and easy jobs tedious. It makes simple things like walking in a straight line and remembering to give phone messages very difficult for him. And yet, I cannot recall ever hearing one word of complaint leave his lips. If he does make a comment on it, it is a matter of fact this-is-how-it-is comment with no feeling or complaint attached. He works hard every day and manages to exercise and work outside and help my mother with the chores inside as well.
I, however, LOVE to complain, or so it would seem. I just can't seem to help it. I get a few ant bites and up go the pictures and wo is me for my poor swollen feet. I feel a little bit tired and I am laid out whenever I get the chance. My long-suffering husband knows about every ache and pain and, ahem, weird bathroom moment that I have. I justify it by saying should I ever pass out and have to be rushed to the hospital then he could tell the doctors every symptom or weird thing that has happened to me that week.
Perhaps now it is easy to see why I feel such love and devotion to my father. I can't seem to stop complaining, and yet here he is with the best reason ever to complain and he doesn't even think about doing it. It's just another wonderful characteristic about this man that makes me love him all the more.
And so, as I sat in choir waiting for the men to finish going over their parts, I allowed this overwhelming feeling of love and amazement wash through me as an undeniable ache to see this man entered into my heart. Thank goodness he is coming to visit next week. :)
